“You’re still amazing! So keep up that confidence”

“You’re still amazing! So keep up that confidence”

Our guest editor Carol Vorderman wants to remind you just how great you all are, whatever your age!

Our guest editor Carol Vorderman wants to remind you just how great you all are, whatever your age!

The road to confidence can be a rocky one. There are things sent to try us both physically and mentally at every stage of life: having children, career ups and downs, divorces, bereavement, second marriages… So how do we stay confident and feeling amazing inside and out as we get a little older?

Both our bodies and our minds are testament to the lives we have led, the opportunities we have seized, the adventures we have revelled in – so we should celebrate them with confidence, not shy away from them.

I believe some people live a life of continual comparison, constantly looking at images they see online and comparing themselves to this unreal ‘reality’. Teenagers, young women, young mums… the nature of social media has made their lives so much more complicated than ours were.

A survey I read about last week even said that more than half of people aged 20-40 consider ‘how good their selfies will look’ as the most important factor when considering where to go on holiday. Err, anyone thought about going because it’s simply what YOU want to do?

But, while women who are older than the selfie generation may not have to worry about finding the perfect Instagram filter, we have to face comments and articles that tell us we are no longer ‘in our prime’, and it’s hard not to take it to heart.

So I think we should redefine what our ‘prime’ is. I want my entire life to be my prime – and because I believe it, then it has been, it is, and it will continue to be! And that’s what confidence does. It kicks a hole in the lunacy of the idea that ‘what other people think matters most’. Confidence allows you to say ‘…actually, I’m doing what I want’ and then go ahead and actually do it. Nothing is more attractive about a person than that. Nothing is more individual, empowering and free than that.

I see and mix with men and women of all ages and I can honestly say, and this is important, I don’t envy anyone. I don’t envy the longing and heartache to find Mr or Miss Right, I don’t envy the exhaustion of bringing up young children while trying to have a career (and believe me, they all feel under immense pressure to be the ‘yummy mummy’, the perfect gym bunny and the most thrusting executive all at the same time), I don’t envy the divorcing time, I don’t envy them any of those things…

I’m so happy as I am. Laughing wildly and spending time with whomever I choose to spend time with and doing whatever I want; from sleeping under the stars on a whim to watching rocket launches and screaming with exhilaration, and even dancing till dawn (admittedly I need two days’ sleep after, but it’s worth it!).

We are here, post-50, and finally we know who we are…. We are FREE to choose the things we want to do and never should we waste a moment of that. We’ve all had ups and downs, but let’s just forget about them as soon as we can and get on with the best bits, because there are so very many best bits.

It shouldn’t all be down to you, though – we all need a bit of help now and again. A boost of confidence from a compliment, a wonderful insightful conversation, or a meaningful thank you, all contribute to a positive sense of self.

Perhaps you struggle to feel confident and don’t have the support network around you to give you that extra boost, or you are a bit of a positivity champion but feel your words fall on deaf ears. So how can we, this group of amazing 50+ women, help each other, remind each other why we are as important, relevant and amazing as ever?

I challenge to you share with each other – here or ‘in real life' – and champion each other so you can champion yourselves, too. 2018 is your year. Be proud of the bodies and minds that have got you here, rocky road or not!

We want to hear your inspirational comments on confidence, amazing compliments you have been paid or how you think you can inspire others. Please do comment below and don't forget to sign up and be a part of this amazing community.

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